New

Today I started my first new job in almost 6 years. At 25, I've only had two jobs since I've been of working age. The first, was at Longhorn, then after I finished my schooling, I was hired on to work at the office where I did my internship. This past Friday, I said goodbye to the "family" I've had for almost 6 years. It was bittersweet. The decision the find a new job wasn't an easy one. It's been something that, as a couple, Donnie and I have prayed about for over a year now. During that time, I had a couple of interviews at various places, that for whatever reason, didn't work out. I took that as a sign that God wanted me to stay put. As disgruntled as I was, I listened. After a while, I finally decided that it was apparent that God wanted me to stay where I was, so I settled in to my position, and decided to "make the best of it." Not to say that where I worked was a bad place, I was just tired. Tired of driving almost 30 minutes both ways to work, tired of being 30 minutes away from my kids, tired of lots of other things as well. But, wanting to be obedient, I listened. Instead of looking for a job, I prayed. "God, if you want me to stay where I am, I will, but if not, open that door of opportunity." And He did. Out of nowhere, a former co-worker called me, and informed me that another person at her job had turned his notice in that day and she had told her office manager about me, and she wanted to me call her. I called her the very next day and set up an interview. After a grueling week of waiting, I got the call that I got the job! I was very excited and very upset at the same time. Not a "bad" upset, more of a "sad" upset. Turning in my notice was one of the hardest things I've had to do. This group of people were there when I got married, had Cannon, Donnie lost his job, and many more trying times. I felt like I was leaving family. I didn't think it would hit me as hard as it did, but Friday as I was packing up my things, I couldn't help but cry. And it wasn't only my coworkers. I have formed a relationship with a lot of my patients. I know all about their lives, and they know mine. I've watched some of those babies grow up. It was very bittersweet. In the end, I know it was meant to be, and things will be better in the long run. I just have to remember that God is in control and put all my faith in Him.

Through The Fire

So many times, I've heard people say "why would God let this happen?" I had a patient of mine actually tell me once "I don't understand why I'm sick, God said we'd never get sick" To which I replied "no, I don't think He ever said that." People always, me included, why "bad things happen to good people." I was just listening to The Crabb Family song "Through The Fire" and the song is so true. It says "He never promised that the cross would not get heavy, and the hill would not be hard to climb. He never offered our victories without fighting, but He said help would always come in time." People like to think that life should be perfect, without blemish. And so many more people think "Hey, if I go to church and become a Christian and start living right, life with be great." Hate to say it, but it's almost just the opposite. Once you make the decision to start living "right"with God, it's almost like you get thrown out to the wolves. The devil seems to attack more when he knows you're living right than ever before. When that happens, lots of Christians give up thinking "well, I can't live right, it's too hard" or "Go obviously doesn't care about me since He's letting this happen." The truth is, living right is hard. Harder than living "wrong" as a matter of fact. As the song says, God never said to us that life wouldn't be hard. He never said that we wouldn't have trials and tribulations. He only said that He only said that He would be there to help us along the way. All we have to do is call on Him. Another thing people do, is pray for something, it doesn't turn out the way they plan, so they give up, thinking God didn't hear their prayer. They actually had an article about this very subject about a month ago in the Tennessean. God is an on-time God. Our choir at church sings a song that says "He's an on-time God, He may not come when you want Him, but He'll be there right on time." What this means is, just because a prayer doesn't get answered as soon as you pray it, or with the outcome you wanted, doesn't mean God didn't hear it. As Garth Brooks said in his song "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers." And it's not that they are really "unanswered" they are just answered with a different answer than maybe what you wanted. Let's say you pray for patience. Guess what?? God isn't going to let you wake up the next day with the patience of Job. No. He's going to put you in situations in which you can choose to exercise patience. God gives you the ability to do things, He doesn't just hand it over. God gives you the ability to make your own decisions. He just stands by, hoping you'll make the right ones. If you don't, He's still there. God doesn't give up on His people. His people give up on Him. God never leaves. People leave Him. He's always there, good or bad, right or wrong. You always have the choice to go running back into His arms.
Let me end this by saying, I'm not one to judge anyone, and I don't. Everyone make mistakes, everyone doesn't have the same idea of being a "Christian." Some think it's ok to drink, smoke, and do other things, and still be a Christian. I, for one, don't think it's "wrong, you're going to go to Hell and God will never love you" it's just not for me. I won't ever say that someone isn't a Christian because they choose to do those things or other things. This isn't my world to judge, and I thank God for that!!! That's probably the hardest job anyone would ever have to do. So, don't ever think that I think that "I'm better than so-and-so" because that's the farthest thing from the truth. I'm just little ol me, trying to live my life for God, and be the mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, aunt, etc. He wants me to be. And it's hard sometimes.

Interesting

Here I am. My first blog, as the title indicates, this should be interesting! I figured I'd start a blog to keep people updated on what's going on in our lives, without taking up a lot of room on my Myspace. So if you're here reading this, Hello!!! This first post will be very random. I have lots of things on my mind right now.
First and foremost, I want to say, in the event that I post something on here that you, the reader, don't agree with, please don't start up a debate or arguement. That's not what I'm here for. However, I will be speaking quite often about my faith, and my God, just to let you know ahead of time, that way if it offends you, you can choose to erase the web address and not come back, or you can continue to read and hopefully be touched in some way. Anyhow, with that said, let me vent for a moment.
Let me say this. The devil is R-E-A-L. For those of you who don't believe that, let me tell you a little story. My husband, a big, strong manly man, has, in the past (meaning, before I met him) suffered from anxiety attacks. He eventually got to the point that he could tell when they were approaching, and overcome it. Well, here in the past month or so, they have been trying to sneak back in. He wakes up in the middle of the night screaming, has terrible nightmares, anxiety during the day and so forth. About a week or two ago, on a Wednesday night, we had prayer for him at church. We prayed for God to give him the strength to overcome these anxiety attacks, and mostly, for whatever foul spirits that were trying to come against him, to be bound. So, after that, he's been feeling pretty good. God is awesome! Then, last night, as I was laying on the couch, he says "Did you see this paper I got in the mail?" He brings it to me, and what it is, is a paper from a "research" group that is doing research on people with anxiety to try all these new meds and such. Now, mind you, we haven't signed him up for anything, or even mentioned this anxiety to anyone except our church. How sneaky, I thought. My first thought was for him to just trash it. Then as he walked toward the trash can, I thought, "no, burn it." So as he was searching for a lighter or a match, (which is difficult to find in our house since we don't smoke!)
another thought filled my head, and I know it had to be from God. And all at once I said "Noooo....don't burn it, bring it to me." Of course he wanted to know what in the world I was going to do with this paper. "I'm taking it to church" was my response, to which his was "you're WHAT?!?!" "I'm taking it to church, and I'm telling everyone about it, then I'm going to leave it on the altar for God to handle." Hmmm. Not something I would ordinarily say. Very interesting to me, the way God sneaks in. And also, even more interesting to me the way the devil sneaks and and tries to convince my hubby that he needs "help" with his anxiety and he should be a part of this group. I said all that to say this, I BELIEVE in Satan and his evil ways. I believe that if you give him an inch, he'll take 10 miles. I believe that he uses ways we'd never even think of to sneak into our lives, and if we're not smart enough to realize it, he'll destroy us. We have to be aware of things at all times, and be able and ready to fight should the need arise.
I said this was going to be a random post about lots of things, but this one thing has taken enough room for now. I'm going to go do some house cleaning before I have to go to church. Thanks for reading, and come back soon for more crazy ramblings!!!